Sweet Curry Lentil Soup with Mistress Mae

This is Mistress Mae. And this week I cooked her a sweet curry lentil soup. I met Mae when I was four and we traipsed in and out of the same schools until we were 18 and went to separate colleges. One of my first experiences with experimental cooking involved Mae, a microwave (we were not allowed to use the stove), brown sugar and carrots. The experience struck me so much, that when I mention Mae to my mom, she brought up the brown sugar microwaved carrots as well.

Mae and I didn’t talk much over the last five years, aside from the occasional facebook post. I remember Mae once commenting on a link I posted on facebook of a photography project I was working on documenting life at the BDSM Chateau where I was training. She wrote, “Where was I when you were becoming fucking AWESOME?” And I wanted to tell her that I had always been awesome, but that I was just shy. When we met up after college, after both finding ourselves living in Brooklyn, she asked what I was doing. I told her that I was working as a dominatrix. She replied with the epitome of nonchalance, “Oh, cool. I was working as a domme last year.”

Mae is a dominatrix AND a vegetarian. Which is something that I had not learned well enough until after cooking this meal for her, and showing her the blog post, to which her only comment was, “CHICKEN BROTH?” Oops. Consent was always something that I had thought about in regards to the dungeon, not the kitchen. As a dominatrix I have learned how to negotiate 'scenes' and I suppose that it is important to negotiate your wants and needs in all aspects of your life, and make your hard limits of ‘meat broth’ be known upfront.

Mae will tell you that you can use vegetable broth in this recipe, and I will tell you what my father told me, “never trust a vegetarian.”

Sweet Curry Lentil Soup

One medium sized sweet potato

Red Onion

3 handfuls chopped Kale

1 cup of green lentils

Chicken Broth / Bouillon

Curry Powder

Paprika

Dill

Bay leaf

Cumin

Olive Oil

Salt and Pepper

1. Cube the sweet potato, the onion and chop the kale. Heat oil in soup pot on medium, and cook the veggies until the onions are caramelized.

2. Pour chicken broth (or water and chicken bouillon) so it just covers the veggies and they just start to float. Add in 3 sprigs of dill and 2 bay leaves. Wait for liquid to start to boil and turn it to simmer. Simmer veggies for 30 minutes or until the sweet potatoes are soft.

3. Once soft, turn heat off and remove the bay leaves. Take an immersion blender (or food processor / blender) and blend until smooth. Add in 2-3 heaping tablespoons of curry powder, 1 teaspoon of cumin and a dash of smoked paprika. Add salt and pepper to taste.

4. Can be served with a dollop of yogurt or sour cream and garnished with a fresh sprig of dill.

Martine Phoenix Shredded Salad

Martine Phoenix came over for a photo shoot the other day. I don't know who came up with the aphorism 'don't feed the models', but I am a firm believer that you can't do anything well while hungry. This salad provided us with the proper vitamins and nutrients to do a naked photo shoot in Prospect Park.

Salad
1/2 head lettuce
3 large carrots - grated
3 small beets - grated
2 avocados
1 can cannellini beans
handful of radish flowers, sunflower shoots, or sprouts of any kind

Dressing
Juice of 1 large lime
1/4 cup - Olive oil
Splash of Balsamic Vinegar
Soy sauce
Salt and pepper
Hot pepper flake
Splash of lime hot sauce


1. Rinse and chop lettuce (any kind is fine).

2. Shred or grate carrots and beets and cube the avocados. 

3. Add shredded carrots, beets, rinsed cannellini beans, cubed avocados, and handful of sprouts to your lettuce and mix gently with your hands.

4. To make the dressing - combine all ingredients into a glass bowl and whisk together. Pour over salad when you are ready to eat and enjoy. 

Miss Couple's Shrimp Superfood Salad

After a day of kinky photo shooting in an abandoned insane asylum in Queens, Miss Couple and I came back to my apartment contemplating the possibility of having contracted tetanus, lead poisoning and possibly rabies. We were feeling depleted, dirty and VERY hungry.

I decided to cook up this shrimp superfood salad based on a recipe I found on IowaGirlEats.com and what I had available in my kitchen. I also doubled her recipe because it keeps well in the fridge, and it is fucking delicious. This dish is incredibly versatile; you can eat it cold, with shrimp, chicken or tofu, as a side dish, as a main course or on a bed of fresh spinach. Anyway you eat it, you won't regret it.

Miss Couple's Shrimp Superfood Salad:

1 cup of dry quinoa (red or white) (cooked as per directions and cooled)
3 ears of fresh corn kernels (or 1 can of corn - rinsed)
1 can of black beans
2 diced avocados
1/2 medium sized red onion, diced
1 orange, peeled and diced
1 sweet grapefruit
1 handful chipped cilantro
2 handfuls sunflower sprouts (if you have them)
salt and pepper to taste

1/2 lb shrimp
pat of butter
2 lemons or 2 limes - juiced
1/8th cup olive oil
balsamic vinaigrette
4 cloves of garlic - dived

1. Cook the quinoa according to directions and let cool.

2. Add corn kernels, black beans, diced avocados, red onion, orange, grapefruit, cilantro and sunflower sprouts to quinoa and mix with a spatula.

3. Heat butter in pan, add shrimp once butter is melted.  Add diced garlic and cook shrimp until pink.

4. Add lime/lemon juice, olive oil, and a splash of balsamic. Turn off heat.

5. Put shrimp in separate container and add the juice left in the pan to the salad and mix. Add salt and pepper to taste.

6. Dish out the salad and decorate as you will with the shrimp!

Enjoy!

Mistress Blunt's Beet Greens

Mistress Blunt says, "Only you can prevent veggie top waste!" This recipe can be used for turnip, beet, and radish greens! It is super easy to prepare. It makes a good side dish or light summer meal, and best of all makes sure that you utilize the whole vegetable and get all of the nutrients and yadda, yadda.

Mistress Blunt's Beet Greens
1 bunch beet greenssmall handful chopped shallots
3 cloves of garlic diced
quarter cup of water (for steaming)
splash of balsamic
splash of red wine
salt and pepper
crushed red pepper flakes

serves: 1

1. Take your leftover beet greens and wash them thoroughly.

2. Chop up the better part of a medium sized shallot. Throw them in a hot pan with olive oil.

3. When shallots start to brown toss the beet greens into the pan, reduce heat and stir. Add a quarter cup of water and cover.

4. Dice the garlic and add to the beet greens and shallots and turn up the heat.

5. Splash in the balsamic and red wine and add salt, pepper and crushed red pepper flakes to taste.